Covid Journal Entries

     Reflection is always key to healing, or at least that is what I'm always told. I looked back in my personal journals and discovered that the amount of stress I was under during covid was crazy. From teaching from my car to finding essentials for our home. I didn't have internet at home, so I spent whole days using my hotspot off my phone to do the active teaching and answering emails. 

    I didn't realize just how much of an impact it had on my mental health. I was terrified of the unknown and kept making day to day list of things that needed to be done just "in case." In case of what? I didn't add that part of why I made these endless lists. 

    I spent a lot of time outside doing hobbies that were nurturing. I picked up gardening and trout fishing. I read through about four separate journals and discovered that I wasn't really living. I was just surviving. My mom and I learned how to properly can food, preserve meat, and dehydrate various veggies. We were dooms day prepping. At one point our local grocery store had hardly anything on the shelves. We drove into TN just to find more food items. 

    Scary would be a perfect way to describe how we saw everything. Mom had hand sanitizer everywhere. We carries soup with us and invested in solar powered chargers for our various electronics. I don't think the fear will ever truly be gone. I fear that we are headed into another "scary" era in history. How will we deal with that. 


    Maybe making lists was my way of dealing with stress? In some weird way completing the list each day make it all bearable. 


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