Life of the Party

     Tis the season to be (rainy) not jolly.  It's sad to say that down here in the south we are more worried about rain than snow. I have been in flip flops for days and it looks like this weather is going to continue.  I'm not complaining, and I'm actually enjoying the warmer weather. I love the thought of wearing shorts in December. I have come accustomed to carrying an umbrella and to have a jacket in hand. I'm not an expert, but shouldn't this be worrying us as a society?        

      Now that the festivities have died down it's back to reality. My poor desk seems to have suffered during the holidays. I have been so entrapped in the Christmas mood that I have totally forgotten all the "missed" work that needs to be done. In all honesty, I just didn't want to do it.        I avoided going out today, so I guess I missed all the AFTER CHRISTMAS SALES today. I have also neglected to check my favorite websites. I guess in a lot of ways I've been a hermit today. It just doesn't feel like December, and I cannot enjoy the 65 degree weather. The rain has had an incessant battle against my roof all day and I've had a book in my hand!   "The Host" by Stephanie Meyers has really had all my attention all day. It is very entertaining. Hopefully, I will have it finished by next week!   

A dear friend will be missed this year although holidays will still have cheer we will think of you as if you were here instead of what is truly clear His charismatic attitude was always the best he never backed down from any test He loved his truck above all the rest A hunting buddy was laid to rest and his dog was left without a conquest My friend will never send weird messages again but now I don't know where to begin I find weird things that remind me of you I wish you were here too Who else is going to jumpstart my truck and who else is  going to get their truck stuck

      After a startling wakeup call this morning, everything seemed to fall into place. I could smell the aroma of mom's traditional cooking and  I could hear the marathon movies playing softly in the back ground. The spirit of Christmas had descended upon my house. We even put up a tree this year!       This Christmas event was very small because my grandmother has decided not to join us. Although my family is small, we still usually fix enough food to feed an army. Christmas is always a tough time, and we are still missing my grandfather. He will forever be missed. I'm expecting a few friends to stop by and I know my sister will be in shortly. Today will only get better. I just wanted to wish all of you a very Merry Christmas! May your bellies be full and your cups never be empty! 

     It seems as if Christmas stuff goes out in stores earlier every year. I guess this is the retailers hopes that we will buy more or at least be interested. The stores are lined in red awaiting Thanksgiving to come and go. It's an odd time of year to be in moody funk, but I seem to have found myself in one. I'm usually counting down the days until Thanksgiving, but not this year.       The gloomy weather doesn't really inspire hope. My grandmother will not be joining us this year for the holidays. It seems as if she wants to spend them with her "real" family. Wow, that was a shocker and a disappointment. I just want one holiday to go well. 

        Honestly, fall is my favorite season of the year. We have colder air, changing leaves, and football. As I sit on the cold bleachers and cheer on my students, it finally hits me that this is the moment that I'm truly at my best.         I am the teacher who... - changes the next day's lesson to include a child's favorite song - stays late at games to congratulate her students - calls at least six parents a week for a "good" check in - lesson plans during faculty meetings just to get ahead  - buys recent books for her students to read - knows that one day it will all be worth it - attends graduation just to see her former students smile

      Such a small word to have such a huge connotation. The word, "loss" can have so many meanings, and its meaning can change due to circumstance. After many years of thinking about this word, I have come to the conclusion that no two people will have the same understanding of loss. So what is loss to me?        Loss isn't getting rained on and having my day go to hell. Loss is an experience of having something or someone taken away abruptly. Spasmodically wishing that that entity could be brought back into existence is a form of loss. Loss is the girl who slowly realizes all her childhood friends have become adults, and she has stayed the same. Loss is seeing everyone around you moving on, and at the same time you are stuck.         Loss isn't about being right all the time. Sometimes your monotonous life continues without your knowledge. You are not always the victor in every argument. Being wrong, however bad it...

         The school year has begun and it is going to be a promising year. I have many potential students bursting with knowledge. The first day jitters have left me and I'm getting back into the pattern of teaching. Reluctantly, I'm still cramming the night before class to finish last minute presentations, notes, annotations, and grades. The enjoyment of teaching is still something I hold dear.           I will miss the long lazy days of fishing with my dad, and endless leisure time to spend with a good book.  Living the ascetic life was amazing. My days were spent gardening, reading, mowing, fishing, and swimming. I will miss the late night chats with my mom about her job and the drama that comes with it. I have used this summer time as a parapet of sorts. It has shielded me from the reality of work.  

 A day well spent with the father figure in my spasmodically life. Today was awesome to say the least. We were up before dawn and loading the boat with supplies.      This was my meager catch of the day. Although I spent most of my day sun tanning, I was also actively fishing. There beauties were baited with worms and artificial bait. The water was calm and transparent. Fishing is such a relaxing sport, and I fully appreciate the time spent with my dad. School starts back soon, and I'll miss these precious moments. 

       True friendship is hard to come by, and when you discover you have it, cherish it!  I'm one of the lucky people who has two best friends. They were not always in my life, but perfect timing and good memories have brought them closer.         I took out time today to truly appreciate what I have. Hopefully, one day when we are old, we will see that all this wasted time of hanging out and cooking will be worth the laughs and jokes. It's not the time that matters, but the people we choose to spend it with. Thank the people who are in your life and make sure they know that they matter. I would rather have two best friends than eight "so called friends."